This post is brought to you by History and 23andMe.
Above, my paternal great-grandparents, my maternal great, great grandfather (the grown-up). Below my paternal grandfather in the middle between his big brother and sister.
HISTORY is recreating the iconic ROOTS mini-series. While I was not yet born when the original series aired, “Kunta Kinte” was certainly part of the cultural conversation growing up and I’m eagerly awaiting the new version which premiers on Monday, May 30th at 9pm ET. ROOTS is an historical drama of an African family through the trials and tribulations of slavery, and its impact through multiple generations and beyond. To build awareness for the show, I’ve partnered with HISTORY and 23andMe (A DNA genetic testing service) to bring the story of identity in general, as well as my own identity to the forefront of the conversation. This is part one of a two-part essay. Here, I’m discussing my own identity and how it’s evolved throughout my life. Then, in a couple of weeks, when I get the results from my genetic test, I will share if and how knowing the details of my actual genetic ancestry affects my own personality identity. And yes, this is probably one of the coolest marketing campaigns I’ve ever been invited to work on. Follow ROOTS on Twitter (#ROOTS) and Facebook, and to find out more, click here.
—
Over the years, I’ve been mistaken for Puerto-Rican, Brazilian, Moroccan, Italian, Israeli, Algerian, Indian, Hawaiian, Mexican, and Guatemalan. In the summertime I can tan to very dark and in the winter I can get pretty pasty and depending on the way my hair or makeup is done I can ‘pass’ for almost anything. The term I’ve heard most often to describe my look is ‘exotic’ and I think that being labeled as such for so many years has deeply affected my own cultural and racial identity. I often feel I have the ability to either totally blend in wherever I go, or totally stick out. Sometimes I think of my chameleonesque tendencies as a kind of superpower, honed over the years by hanging out with my diverse family/community and feeling simultaneously ‘part of’ and ‘alienated from’ different aspects of my races/religion/cultures at different times.
I’ve grown up knowing that my dad, who self identifies as Afro-American, is actually quite mixed with both white and Native American. Our family lore goes that my great grandfather, William Blakeney, was the son of a slave-owner. He had very light skin and eyes, and like his other mixed race brothers and sisters, he was sent by his father to be raised on the Cherokee reservation so as not to grow up a slave like their mother. He met my great grandmother on the reservation, Cornelia, who was a chocolatey-skinned poet with a college education –pretty much unheard of for the time period.
On my mom’s side, I’ve learned that my family came from Eastern Europe (places now known as Lithuania, Russia and Poland) at the turn of the last century to escape from the Pogroms and the persecution of Jews in Eastern Europe. As far as we can go back, on my mom’s side I’ve been told that we are Ashkenazi Jews.
Being raised multi-cultural means that I carry with me pieces bits and pieces from many cultures. For example, from my dad’s side of the family I learned how to be part of a pack — a real ‘family comes first’ mentality as well as how to use family gatherings to experience highs and lows with grace. From my mom’s side of the family, I learned the value in upholding old traditions (like having Friday night Shabbat dinners together), and I also learned the value in creating my own traditions with respect for the past, but without being beholden to it.
For me, growing up ‘black and Jewish’ meant self-identifying as a person of color, as an ‘other’ (not part of dominant culture) and as ‘mixed.’ I had large posters of Lenny Kravitz on my ceiling (who is also Black and Jewish) and I anxiously awaited new episodes of The Cosby Show so that I could see what Lisa Bonet was wearing — another Black Jew that I identified with. As an adolescent I think that I took comfort in identifying as mixed. My boyfriend in high school was half Chinese and half Italian. Many of my friends were multi-racial and I identified with people who lived between or inside different cultures as I did.
I often think about how lucky I am to have been raised in Berkeley (a very diverse and liberal city) and to be born in the time period that I was born in. Had I been alive during slavery times in the South, I probably would have been a slave, and had I been alive in Poland during the Pogroms, or during the Holocaust, I likely would have received the same terrifying treatment that the other Jews received. This impacts me everyday. I feel that I have to make the most of my life because, in many ways, I feel like I got the golden ticket: I grew up in one of most liberal cities in the world and I live in a time where we elected our first mixed-race president. Lucky dice roll, huh?
One thing that’s clear to me about identity (perhaps the only thing that’s clear about it) is that it’s not something that one is born with — it’s a potion comprised of roots, culture, language, family, friends, sub-culture, context and it’s a fluid construct, that is ever-evolving. For example, after spending many years living abroad (I’ve lived in Switzerland for two years and Italy for seven years) I learned to identify as a foreigner, as a U.S. American, and as a Californian. There were so few Jews in Florence, Italy, when I lived there that I felt very connected to the Florentine Jewish community as well (even more so than when I’m ‘home’ in California.) I also identified with many of the African immigrants (mostly from Senegal) and we went out frequently together as we bonded over (and danced all night to) favorite hip-hop records, — hip-hop being a sub-culture/movement/community that I have also identified with over the years.
Now, as an adult, my identity has further morphed. While I still identify as mixed, as a person of color, a Black woman, a Californian and as a Jew, I also identify as a mom, as an artist (it’s taken time to own that one), as an entrepreneur and as a blogger. Will my identity undergo another shift once I get my results from 23 and Me? Will knowing my genetic makeup change the way I think about myself? I have no idea. Does knowing what one is made up of change who one is?
Whew. Things are getting deep over here.
One thing that I find so fascinating about identity is that while identity seems rooted in who you are, (in an essential kind of way) identity also seems like something that can be owned or discovered over time.
At the very least, I’m sure it will pique my curiosity about the lives of my ancestors. It’s crazy to think that had William Blakeney not been sent to the Cherokee reservation by his slave-master father, I wouldn’t be here today, or had my family not fled persecution in Lithuania, I would not be here.
Stay tuned for my next post when I reveal my genetic testing results and discuss if and how it changes how I think of my identity. Also, stay tuned for ROOTS airing on HISTORY Monday, May 30th.
This post is brought to you by HISTORY and 23andMe. All opinions are my own.
Beautiful post and sharing here. Thank you.
“Does knowing what one is made up of change who one is?”
Yes..I believe it does. To some extent. It takes you to another path, probably..figuratively speaking, of course. And then you can walk it. Or walk it half-way. Or walk it and come back. But you will always know the path is there.
Fascinating post, Justina.
I’m Jewish, and I’m usually mistaken for somebody from Mediterranean-which is pretty much close lol.
My ex-husband is Jewish as well, and even though we were born, grew up and met in the same city in Ukraine-he looks like a Sephardic Jew. So when we made aliya to Israel, people were in shock every time he opened his mouth and they heard his Russian accent. He looks like somebody from Syria or Iran, say..)) My daughter takes after him..so people here, in California, often think she’s Hispanic.
My second husband has the most interesting story..6 different bloods in him, and yes, black was there too-somewhere around 18 century? The families were prominent and proud enough of their heritage to keep a track of all that..
His aristocracy is palpable. Real aristocracy-the one where you treat everyone with respect and honor because you were brought up in exactly the same way.
I think I always felt a bit different from others. I always have an accent and such, and we moved a lot, and I know where I want to live, and while I love California dearly-it’s not here.. But in a strange way-I feel closer to different people everywhere too. I usually don’t need to make a huge leap so to say..to imagine somebody can be really different.
Beautifully written and so thoughtful. My 23andme results were a shock. I’d been told all my life that my maternal great grandmother was Native American. She was not. A deeply felt, lifelong connection to another culture was, logically, in an instant, erased. Emotionally, that connection remains a deep one.
Beautiful!!!!!!
Thank you for writing this and taking us on your journey.
This brings me back to the first post that I ever read of yours “the old, tired, lazy, ethnic label” .. it hit home for me just as todays post has.
Identity has been a tough one topic for me – growing up our family history was not one that was discussed. Yes, there are bits and pieces I’ve pieced together from family dinners and such – but for the most part the focus was on religious identity, not on race, ethnicity, politics, etc.
My parents (my dad’s family is from Barbados, supposedly some Scottish a dash of Native American and miscellaneous other while my mom’s family is mix of Taino, Basque, and Andalusian) were very private about our heritage – no stories of growing up a minority, no dialogue about the civil rights movement or the “black experience”, no tales of ancestry or lore … only talk about how we are all created equal, that pride based on skin color and background fuels prejudice …that and a focus on biblical references to help us be “good”..
Clearly there is more to the story, but what may have been done with good intent has left me feeling disconnected, especially since as an adult i don’t really share their cookie cutter religious views …. in facing the world, there isn’t a culture thats feel comfortable identifying with without feeling like an imposter ..
now at an age where I am constantly asked when I am going to have kids because “the clock is ticking”…. if, and that is a strong if leaning towards probably not due to fertility issues and not being in a financial position to provide adequately for a child, we have children – what is the identity that i can pass on?
also am embarrassed that i never dated another minority and have been accused of continuing in the pattern of whitening the family (of the 8 children in my dads family, 7 of them married interracially aka married, and except for 2 cousins the same goes for the rest of my cousins and sister)
and in my new-ish found interest in defining my identity, part of me feels uncomfortable having a sense of pride in part due to a fear of alienating my partner and another part of me is embarrassed that it is an issue at all
That being said, you and your family are a perfect example of how beautiful it is to embrace the many facets of identity that is constantly at play.
Thank you for such a thoughtful and provoking post.
I too have been “seen” as everything, particularly that I look “exotic” like you commented. I am a native Californian of Mexican descent and too recently took my DNA to be analyzed to see what I really am.
I am a true mutt of so many things. My family has joked that we are everything but Aborigines since my DNA pretty much covers a dash of everything from around the world. I was glad to see exactly what my DNA is so that I have a fuller idea of what my make up is. In particular, my Native American make up which is one 50%. Knowing that I have ties to the Americas, Europe, the Middle East, and my small 5% from Africa, really makes me feel more like a global citizen and a connection to everywhere that I have never felt or identified with before.
Being mother of a multi-ethnic ( I don’t like the word bi-racial since that’s limiting) child, I am so happy to give my daughter a fuller view of what my side of the family is. Has it changed my self identity? Yes, in some ways. Knowing that I am more than 50% of a culture/ identity will now make me look stronger at my indigenous side and not just what this nation is now called. My DNA is such a learning experience that I can share with my family and others that want to know “what” I am.
Amazing mix of culture and thoughts. Love this post!
Love your story. Heritage of all backgrounds fascinates me. Most Americans come from diverse backgrounds and we should embrace the diversity of our country.
It is so fascinating to hear about people’s family history..I never miss an episode of “who do you think you are?” And, loved the original “Roots” when I saw it as a kid. I know some of my tree since I’m descended from The Mayflower & researched beyond that to Middle Ages. But, To think how MANY people in your ancestory line brought YOU HERE. How many survived to bring you HERE . Where did they originate? Who were the first? How the heck did they all survive through EVERYTHING, wild animals, birth without drugs, violent seas..the list can go on forever.. for me to get here? It’s mind boggling. We can only go back so far with the archives but before that? Who knows? But the fact is, we are the proof..we are here from so many, interlocking threads of lives..we are just one vast family. I often think about that when I feel so insignificant & unimportant..it makes me have an attitude of gratitude & awe.
Beautiful post. Looking forward to hearing the results. Have been wanting to do the same and very pleased to see this service stretches as far as British shores.
I so relate to this post, your outlook and your family’s history. I am mixed (mainly black and white, in simplistic terms) and for the most part have loved it and thought it was so special to be a part of “it all” but different too. However, I am nervous to get my DNA tested for specifics on my ethnic heritage/geneology. I can’t wait to hear your results. Maybe it will inspire me to just do it and let the curiosity and my love of history win out over my anxiety. I’ll be checking out “Roots” too as I have never watched it. I also heard the show “Underground” is quite good but haven’t seen it myself yet.
We all should know our roots to understand us and life from a different perspective. It is really interesting stuff.
Such a nice post, as always !!!
This is such a fascinating topic!
I’ve always known to be European: born and raised in Italy of a fair skinned, blonde Italian father and an olive skinned, dark haired Argentinian mother (of spanish and southern Italy ancestors). But… I’ve always been labelled as “exotic” (people ask me, when I say that my mother is not Italian, if I’m from Lebanon, Israel, Turkey…) and now I’m wondering if some DNA came from Middle East.
Do you think 23andMe can check the European dna to see such small fluctuations in the Mediterranean areas? I’m so curious…
I love this post! Identity is such a double-edged sword. I quite understand being afraid to have one’s genetic identity tested. It could potentially change your idea of “who” you are, either for better or worse. My sister is the ancestry buff in our family and jokes that we are the product of at least three hundred years of well-born women marrying “down.” We are so WASPy that we have the stingers in our tails removed at birth ( another family joke). I’m seriously considering 23andMe just hoping to find out something startling and interesting. The only good thing about being so homogeneous is that I look like all the medieval portraits in the National Portrait Gallery in London. Seriously, it’s weird.
Thank you for posting this. It’s nice to be reminded that there are so many identities and histories that come together to form a human. I think it’s helpful for the little humans we raise to understand how many cultures have been passed down to them. Mad love to you!
Hi, i feel that we saw you visited my blog thus i
stumbled on return the favor.I am seeking to
find items to improve my website!I suppose its
ok to utilize several of your opinions!!
I first noticed you on the cover of Sunset Magazine. I was drawn to your look, and especially the name of Blakeney. I too, was curious about our family history. I did my DNA through Ancestry. There are EIGHT William Blakeney’s on my family tree, also plantation and slave owners. Just wondering if there is a connection.
Hello, I enjoyed reading your story and very proud of your success as a designer. I am a lifetime friend of your dad Charles (Chalos) as we used to call him when we were kids. Keep up the good work and hope to see more of your great work.
Larry